5 Tips for the Last Single Friend Standing
I'm in a long term relationship with freedom
When all your friends are coupled off, moving in, getting married, popping out kids, and you’re the last single friend standing, it’s hard not to feel alienated.
An easy solution is to remind yourself that you’re waiting for your person, and you’re not going to settle for something less just to fit in or to quell your mother’s persistent nagging.
Being the only single friend can be rough, but there are ways to alter your perspective and embrace your current single status.
Here are 5 tips.
1. Find yourself a new tribe of single friends
The older we get, the less effort we put into making new friends.
But when you’re the last single woman in the group and are tired of talking about someone else’s relationship drama, it can be so cathartic just to gab with other single women who get it.
Yes, we’re no longer living in those prime college years, when a fifteen minute convo in the dorm hallway could lead to a lifelong friendship. You’re going to have to put in more effort than that.
But if you’re proactive with new people you meet, you’ll slowly be able to form a core group of single friends, and stop feeling like the odd woman out.
2. Bring a friend as a plus one
The dreaded plus one! The bane of every single woman’s existence.
Instead of waking up in night sweats because you have three weeks to find a date to your friend’s wedding, throw tradition to the wind and start bringing friends or coworkers as your plus one.
Because everything is better with a wingwoman by your side.
3. Get online - but sans all the pressure
Being the last single friend in the group can mean a lot of pressure to settle down.
And while it’s never good to start a relationship because you feel pressured to do so, you still should embrace the tools at your disposal as a single woman in 2018 - namely, online dating.
Even if you’ve tried it in the past with no luck, approach it with a positive attitude. Yes, you never know what you’ll get, but you should always be open to being pleasantly surprised.
It can also be helpful to be signed up to a couple of different dating sites (34% of singles are signed up to atleast 2 dating sites).
Different sites have different vibes, and the men you meet on one won’t necessarily match the men you meet on another.
Elite Singles is a great option for career-driven daters (80% of members are 30+ and university grads) who are less into swiping and want someone else to do the matching (in this case an algorithm based on a personality questionnaire).
Or, try a dating site like Zoosk, which is a more popular site (3+ million messages sent daily) that still places a definite emphasis on compatibility. Their Behavioral Matchmaking gets to know your swipes - likes and dislikes - and offers matches accordingly.
One last piece of advice: You can make the whole online dating experience feel less overwhelming by checking the sites sporadically - say, once a week. This way it’ll feel like a fresh experience each time.
4. Have an honest conversation with yourself
Contrary to what society will tell you, marriage is not for everyone. The idea of never finding that one person to settle down with is scary. But for some it’s an accepted reality.
The modern family is changing, and it’s fine if you don’t fit the traditional mold. Be honest with yourself and don’t let anyone make you feel bad for not wanting (or having) the things they think you should want (or have).
5. Don't think long term. Think now.
There is something exponentially worse than being single forever - being stuck in the wrong relationship, for the rest of your life, out of fear of being alone.
For now, you have only yourself to worry about - the best place to be if you want to truly live in the moment. So the next time you meet someone, why not start off with, "I hope this is someone I can have a great night with” and nothing else.
Take your time, explore the many options available to you, and enjoy being single while you still can! And if you are looking to meet someone, check out our list of the best dating sites that will help you meet one of the good ones.